My first post

Hi everyone! today is my first post and hoping people will follow my story.



We are currently on a undeserved break from any infertility treatments. I'm anxious to start them up again, however not sure if I will ever be ready for it. As some people know, its a very trying and emotional process. We have experienced so much heart ache in the past months and not sure I am put myself through it or Paul for that matter.

To this day, I still tell myself and believe that we can do it on our own, and I don't want to let myself down, but month after month with disappointment makes it harder. Now, This month, well I should say in March, We made a HUGE progress on our own and I ovulated for the first time to the best of my knowledge. At least on my own, without any medication helping me out. Every once and awhile, you "get by with a little help from your friends" and my friends were the infertility drugs. The didn't help me the way I wanted, but I"m working on getting rid of the bitterness, its not something you can just "let go" or move on with your life. It takes time, how much time, who knows, maybe I will never get over it. Its looking that way.

I am currently on a strict diet, well, not too strict, but strict enough. I told myself before the diet started that if and when we decide to do more treatment, that I need to loose about 30-40 lbs. So, unannounced to me, I had to go on a diet, drs orders due to my sugar level. As of Today 04/05/08, 3 weeks into the diet, I have lost about 10 lbs. I want to thank my ovulation to my diet, but who knows. I am doing low carb and for those you know me well, knows that it worked before and lost about 40-50 lbs about 4+ years ago. Hearing it from the dr, really pushed me to do it, I would always come up with an excuse not to do it. "Oh, but I could be pregnant, so this slice of pizza. wont hurt me" RIGHT.... I do feel much better, health wise and I can just start to tell the difference in my clothes, so I will keep plugging away at the diet. I am going to start exercising again, so more weight should be coming off in the upcoming weeks. I keep telling myself, Annmarie, if you loose the weight, you will be rewarded and my reward is a baby. God, I hope I'm right. And also seeing those commercials on T.V. with cute spring outfits, that's pushing me as well.

So, that's it for now, oh WAIT, how could I forget, We added another furbaby to our family. Miss Molly Maroney, shes a very good dog and we just love her. She has her first "spa" appt today. shes getting a bath, nails clipped and more, so she will smell pretty. Thanks for reading and I hope you will follow me through this battle we are at war with!